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Everyone knows that to get preferential
treatment, you gotta be rich or famous.
But what about the rest of us who don't command vast
Bill Gates wealth or brag the name recall of
Paris Hilton? Are we doomed to a life of
miserable invisibility? Not quite. If you
can't flash the cash, then flash your title.
Being called "Dr." opens doors in many places.
It's not that easy, of course. Ph.Ds earn that
title and it takes four to five years to gain
one. But, hey, no worries. In this easy guide, you'll
be commanding respect as only a Ph.D can.
Option 1: Grab a phony diploma
form
PhonyDiplomas.
For $149, you get a fake transcript and fake
diploma from the University of your choice. It
looks so real that the next time the waitress
ignores you at Fridays, you can discreetly flash your
parchment at her. Watch the lady swoon and accord you
respect as only a wise Ph.D can. Boost the
impress-power
by carting your diploma around in an all
original Mongogram Bosphore from
Louis Vuitton.
Now you'll reek both power and wisdom!
Option 2: Buy a cutting edge R230
Photo Stylus from Epson then download the cool
diploma templates from
Diploma Templates
. The hard part's deciding whether to have a
Harvard diploma or MIT certificate. Take a
moment to ponder, then print it out at high-res. Now you can adorn your wall with credentials
galore! Don't forget to print wallet sized
diplomas to flash at the airport bag boy so
he'll let you cut the line.
Option 3: This is easy- change your nickname to
Doc.
Each time a friend addresses you, strangers will
assume you got an MD or Ph.D.
Option 4:
Want to be really sneaky?
Purchase an honorary
degree from a hole-in-the -wall
school that gives you a title for cash. For $200, they'll evaluate your degree based on
your life experience. It's that
simple.
Wait three weeks and a complete diploma with
transcripts derived from you skills, military
stint, work tenure and past college credits
arrive in the mail. Pay extra, and you even get
a dean's commendation.
Eager already?
This
degree broker
makes the process easy. Buff up
your credit card and remit a "benefactor's endowment",
and
the degree broker hunts for a school that gets you verifiable
credentials through the
University's Registrar's Office. Et voila!
You're a PhD with a legal degree- but nobody
knows that you didn't have to slog three years
of dissertation for it.
Life Experience Degrees-
Scam? 
The colleges and universities represented by
such
life experience brokers are allegedly registered to issue degrees for
distance learning and portfolio assessment. This
is, allegedly a legal degree. You are
encouraged to include it on your
resume, business cards, letterhead, passport,
web site, job application, or any other official
document you fill out.
 Remember that while the degree is
allegedly legal, how you choose to use it might not be.
Never misrepresent how your degree was obtained,
otherwise you will be held liable for your
misrepresentation. For this reason it's
critical
that you always be truthful
about how their degree was earned.
How is it that such an endowment of "rapid
degrees" is possible? After the passage of the
controversial
French Legislature allowing the
conversion of work experience into college
credits, various universities around the world
have begun offering honorary bachelors, masters,
doctorates in exchange for an "benefactor's fee"
Read about the legislature
here .
So, do we at Ivy Universities endorse
such degrees?
For novelty purposes (to hang a fancy
diploma on your wall) or maybe to gain some
bragging rights for decades of
experience, YES, we believe this type of degree
has a measure of utilitarian value.
This is the
ONLY endorsed use of the item.
But if the degree obtained is intended
to perpetuate fraud (such as the purchase of
a Doctorate in Surgery to practice medicine, or
to gain a promotion),
we severely frown upon the act. This is
downright criminal and WILL result in jail time.
But if you want our advice: enroll in a
bonafide school where you write real
papers in exchange for real degrees.
By the
way- take everything on this page with a grain
of salt | 
